5 Things I Know About Anxiety at 35 That I Wish I'd Known at 25

Me and anxiety go way back. Waaayy back. I even have vague memories of anxiety attacks before I was old enough to understand what they were. Anxiety has this tendency to come and go through my life where sometimes I hardly struggle with it and other times it's greeting me each morning with fervor- quite vexing really.

As a kid my coping mechanisms were peppermints and apple juice and never eating inside restaurants. Yeah, restaurants were a no go for a couple years-drive thru only! I eventually moved past all that for the most part- except peppermints. I always have some of those on hand as they can be settling.

Therapy has been a part of my life since I was really young, for various reasons, and at 25 the main thing I did to help manage anxiety was just that- go to therapy. I'd journal and sometimes talk to friends as well, but that was about the extent of what I did to try to make it suck less.  

While those things were helpful to a certain extent they only went so far in helping me manage anxiety better. They are just a few of the tools actually available to us when we're trying to feel calmer and more in control of our lives.

Here are 5 things I know about anxiety at 35 that I wish I’d known at 25 that could have helped me become much more resilient against anxiety a lot sooner:

1 You need to get good quality sleep

What person in their 20s is going to prioritize sleep like they should? Not many and back then I prioritized doing whatever I felt like doing until late into the night whether it was going out with friends, an after party, watching shows, scrolling on my phone, and sometimes working. Just getting good sleep- which I was entirely capable of doing- would have had such a huge impact on reducing how anxious I felt. This would have required shifting my mindset away from the idea that since I couldn't ALWAYS go to bed by 11:00 pm because of work (mostly on weekends) why even bother at all? Self-defeating thought process. Don't throw away better because it's not perfection.

2 You need to chill on the alcohol

I was quite the drinker back in the day and it was due in large part to the people I surrounded myself with and the environment I was in. It could be relaxing to my system for sure, but even though I was careful to never drink so much I’d black out or get sick, alcohol did literally nothing for my mental or physical health. So, add the effects it has by itself to sleep getting all hecked up, poor food choices that inevitably go along with drinking, and the recovery time necessary to get back to baseline… I was not supporting my body’s physical or mental health needs and ultimately making anxiety worse.

3 You need to stop eating like a f*cking trashcan

I say this with such vehemence because of the huge impact it has on our mental health. Our gut is our second brain and when we feed it shit, we feel like shit. Whether it's because we aren't getting the nutrients we really need or it's our blood sugar spiking up giving us a burst of energy and then crashing down leaving us feeling like goo. This doesn't have to be complicated, either. Drink water. Eat fruits and veggies. Get enough protein and fiber. Eat out less often. Eat packaged foods less often. You don't have to cut anything out or be perfect. I repeat what I said before- don't throw away better because it's not perfection. Eat well so you give your body the nutrients it needs while also maintaining a fairly stable blood sugar. You’d be surprised how sane that will make you feel.

4 You need to stop using caffeine like a lifeline

You’re taking chances if you already struggle with anxiety and then decide to throw caffeine in the mix. Your chances tilt even more to the negative if you throw that on top of crap sleep, too much alcohol, and eating like a trash can. Sure, you can still have caffeine, but you gotta be intentional about it. When you start feeling jittery, scattered, and like your eyeballs are bouncing around in their sockets unable to settle on anything while your chest is super tight and you feel like you’re breathing through a straw- you know you’ve gone too far. Stop. Doing. This. To. Yourself.

5 You need to pay attention to what your body is trying to tell you

Your body is always trying to be open and honest with you, but you keep ignoring it or downplaying it until it becomes a big enough issue that you can't just sweep it under the rug anymore. Then you act like it's out of left field. Meanwhile your body is flabbergasted because it's been screaming at you to listen and stop treating it like shit. It's not asking for a lot. The basics really- eat healthy, drink water, sleep, truly rest, and MOVE. Get out of your head and into your body. It may be uncomfortable at first, but until you show yourself that it is safe to be in your body and to trust what it's telling you- by paying attention to it AND taking action based on what you've learned- you're going to stay stuck in an unhelpful anxiety and stress ridden cycle.

Applying these things WILL help you start shifting from feeling like an anxious f*ck all the time to feeling calmer and in control of your life. Need some guidance and support in actually making this happen? My SNAP Method program may be just what you're looking for because I help my clients learn how to use sleep, nutrition, activity, and personal self-care practices to reduce anxiety and recover from it faster when it does happen. Send an email to janna@jl-wellness.com and let's talk about it!